Neurotypical Problems and an Autistic Guy who thinks Neurotypical

This is going to be a brief entry.

One of my biggest problems as someone on the autism spectrum is that I don't think like others on the spectrum. Except for transportation, I have pretty neurotypical interests. I drive a car, I hang out with friends, I want my own form of a happy ever after. So that's something that I conflict with constantly. There's a side of me that shows autistic tendencies and one that makes me a regular, neurotypical person. I don't spend most of my life on Wrong Planet (no offense to Alex and the rest of the bigwigs at the site). I strive for interpersonal relationships. At the same time, I wonder if I'm on the autistic fringe, able to function pretty well but also struggling just enough to warrant help to ensure I'm at my best.

For instance, I like to socialize, but sadly it's something I don't get to do too often. Same goes for dating. It's something I wish I could do more often, meet people (especially ladies) my own age.But I struggle. Anxiety turns into me making a fool out of myself. I probably (not knowingly) violate Internet etiquette on a daily basis. But I'm not giving up on being a more sociable person. That's something I REFUSE to do.

I don't fit the mold of the stereotypical person with autism/Asperger's. I'm known for my bubbly personality (first, I'm not gay and second, I hate to brag). I at times struggle with my autism identity, and my peers only make it more difficult. I've been criticized online for some of my comments on several Facebook groups dealing with autism.

So if anyone wonders, being me isn't a piece of cake emotionally. In that regard, it's rough. I'm not autistic enough to fit that stereotype, but I'm also lacking some neurotypical behaviors and synapses to succeed the way I'd like.