A Mediocre Man's Big Issue:

Quoting my journal:

I am way too ambitious. I want to work hard and I'm willing to, but the problem is how to get to the doors I need to open to get where I need to go. It's hard when all you see are road blocks. All I know is that I dream big, and I want the chance to be big.

Am I not doing something right? I'm tired of being the Mediocre Man. I have big dreams. I'm tired of being tiny. There has to be a way to find those right doors.

I wish my life went more like the lyrics to Talking Heads' song "Once in a Lifetime

You may find yourself living in a shotgun shack
You may find yourself in another part of the world
You may find yourself behind the wheel of a large automobile
You may find yourself in a beautiful house with a beautiful wife
You may ask yourself, well, how did I get here?

I just want to be more successful than my parents, and maybe even my uncle (dad's brother). He's a civil engineer who has done well for himself. And although I'm no engineer (but I should have gone that route, seeing how they are in high demand), I still think I can be a success story. I'm willing to sacrifice a bit to become a success. I want to fulfill those big dreams, and I think given the situation, I can.

By the way, January 2013, it was nice knowing you. Godspeed.